Ear yeast and butt squirts

Last Monday Mom noticed I had a crusty spot inside my right ear flap, near the tip. Friday, on the way to work, Mom noticed I had developed an identical crusty spot near the tip of my left ear. And I was shaking my head a lot. So she took a slight detour from work and went to a vet on the mountain. They gave me an appointment for later that afternoon, at which time they stuck a stick up my patooti and declared I had ear yeast. The lady vet was filling a prescription for antibiotics to help rid me of ear yeast when Mom said no, it would be cheaper to get it at the drugstore. So off we went with a piece of paper and a bottle of liquid that I was to later find out was meant for torture. Apparently I wasn’t listening very well when the instructions were given to Mom to “fill both ears with the liquid, massage behind the ears, and let Lexi shake it all out.” *sigh*

After work we dropped the paper off at the drugstore and went home, intending to pick up my new medicine a little later. Before a little later came around, the person at the drugstore called Mom to ask her if she knew this medicine was almost one hundred dollars. By the look on Mom’s face, I could tell that was a lot. It was supposed to be generic. The drugstore person said this strength didn’t come in generic, but that the vet had it for eighteen dollars. Mom said I could wait until Monday to start my new medicine, which was the next time she would be on the mountain. In the meantime, she would keep using the special liquid in my ears.

This is Sunday, and I won’t have my medicine until tomorrow. So we know that is not what caused my butt squirts. They started in the middle of the night (thank you, Dad, for getting up and letting me out). Then even worse right after the sun came up (thank you, Mom, for getting up and letting me out). Then came the really bad news. Mom squirted some yukky pink stuff in my mouth and said no food until this stopped.

Mommy decided to let me eat some plain rice for dinner. That didn’t cause any problems so she cooked me an egg and mixed it with a little more rice. We are still waiting to see what happens…

I was starved after being denied food all day!

I was starved after being denied food all day!

Mailbox ants

We had mailbox ants today. There were hundreds, maybe thousands, of little black ants all engaged in moving piles of tiny white grains inside our mailbox. Mom thinks they were the queen’s eggs. Mom didn’t have any ant spray so she used flea spray. Quick thinking, eh? Anyone seen anything like this before?

mailbox ants


My bestest friend Auntie Cary packed me my very own lunch today. We had a lovely time eating together at noon at the church on the mountain. She forgot the broccoli, but the chicken was very good. Then she left, and did not take me, even though I made it very clear I wanted to go with her. I patiently waited for her to return:

Lexi waiting for CaryIsn’t it cool how my good friend Jabus keeps the hall floors so shiny that they reflect my beautiful hiney?

I was waiting outside with Mom when Auntie Cary returned. She said I could stay with her while Mom ran a church errand. I talked to her before we went inside so she understood how unhappy I was that she had left me. She said I was “really something else.” I hope that meant something good.

P.S. She gave me guilt treats. 🙂

A Moment of Silence

Piper and Lexi Memorial Day
Piper – on the left – visited us for the weekend. Mom asked us to be quiet for a moment to honor all who have served our country and to remember those who have given their lives for this great nation. That was asking a lot of two schnauzers, but we agreed it was a small price to pay. Mom also explained that this was one of the reasons I have the freedom to be a church dog. So I will be silent (oh, this is so hard) for a moment. *silence*
I am Lexi, the all-American dog.

Home all alone

There are no pictures to show today. That’s because Mom left me home. All alone. With my schnauzer cousin Piper. And my Dad. And my people brother Andrew. And my bestest friend Jentry. And The Boy. Yep, all alone. Mom didn’t take me to work. She left me home all alone, where pictures are not taken. I mostly stayed in the closet in my kennel. All alone.

Then, after Dad shut the bedroom door and left the house too, Jentry came looking for me. She finally found me all alone in my kennel in the closet. I wouldn’t come out. She thought I must have done something wrong. Why does everyone always assume I am a bad dog? She finally coaxed me to come out, but I just stood there with my head hung low. That made her think even more that I had committed some heinous crime. Finally, she asked me if I didn’t want to be shut up in the bedroom with Piper. Hallelujah! She got it! That got me talking. Bowowow and arruf. After I unburdened myself to her, she asked me if I wanted to spend the rest of the day downstairs with her. I said yes and off we went. Being home alone the rest of the day wasn’t so bad anymore.

I Am NOT a Mean Old Thing

Today was my second day at my new work. Mommy is not pleased. With me. At all. Last Thursday I got confused – that’s my story and I’m sticking with it. I thought I was supposed to be a guard dog. Someone should have explained to me that I was supposed to be a good dog welcoming committee. Yep, Lexi, the welcoming committee of one. You know everything is done by committee in churches. So today, on the way to work, Mommy spent time outlining my boundaries. NO growling, and NO barking. I guess I didn’t hear the NO part. Hey, these people tried to walk into my office without even asking. They are lucky all I did was growl And the preacher, well, I didn’t recognize him until I had already barked a couple of times. Come on…I had only ever seen him once, and he didn’t give me any treats that time either. *sigh* Now the mean old lady I live with Mommy is threatening to not take me to my job any more. Dad looked especially upset when she told him that. In fact, Mom said that I was so bad at work today that she wasn’t going to memorialize it with any pictures. Grrrr. (Oops, that’s what got me in so much trouble.)

On the way home we stopped at a quickie oil change joint. I thought that Mom must not have been as mad as earlier, ’cause she put me in charge of her credit card while the people changed the oil in our car.

I'm NOT a mean thing.

I’m NOT a mean thing.

But that wasn’t true. She said I could guard her credit card because I was such a mean old thing that no one would try to take it. 😦

Hey, I wonder what else I could buy with this?

Hey, I wonder what else I could buy with this?

Lexis Bday

I am reminding myself that at least someone loves me. Thanks, Noodle.

I am Lexi the guard good schnauzer.

Early Birthday Celebration and What a Present I Got!

Mom made dog bone-shaped cookies to take to work to celebrate my birthday today. I helped get rid of the broken ones, then helped to clean the beaters

Yummy frosting

Yummy frosting

My birthday is actually tomorrow, but we won’t be at the church tomorrow, and Mom didn’t want anyone to miss out. My new bestest friend Cary brought me a treat present. She knows what I like. I am going to start calling her Auntie Cary because she loves me and I stay with her most of the time I am at the church.

Mom told me she had a surprise for me after work today. I thought maybe we were going to the dog treat store, but Mom said it was something even better. She said if I was on my best behavior I might have a new job! We went into a different church and got interviewed. They would let us come on Tuesdays and Thursdays when we aren’t working at the church on the mountain. How great is that! When we were almost done, Mom and the people interviewing us started negotiating salary. I nudged her and she knew I wanted her to just take the job!! They had already asked if I would come to work for free. 🙂 Now we have to wait until Friday to find out if they can meet her salary requirements. She came down a lot from her first number, and they came up a lot from their first number, so maybe they can meet in the middle. I sure hope so. It seems like a good place to work, and I would be the only church dog there. What a great birthday present this would be! Everyone please keep your paws crossed.

I am Lexi, the double church dog.

Annual Check-up

I went to the vet (unwillingly) and got my yearly exams and vaccinations today. The doc also talked Mom into getting a HW test done. It was negative. I could have told them that – I have a strong, worm-free heart. They also stuck that glass stick up my patooty and used what came out for a fecal. No worms. I could have told them that – I have a strong, worm-free colon. When we were done, the vet gave my Mom a piece of birthday cake. When Dr. Poston saw Mom looking at me with cake on her spoon, she said, “You’d better not let me see you give her any of that,” to which Mom replied, “Then you’d better shut your eyes.” Go, Mom! (I also got Arby’s curly fries on the way home.)

I am Lexi, the healthy, worm-free schnauzer.