I normally start my work day on Tuesday. However, Mom has an appointment this Wednesday morning and cannot take me to the church on the mountain, so she took me Monday morning to make up for it. Some making up (yes, this is sarcasm). She forgot my food! The good food Dad had already fixed with my canned topping. Did she forget her food? No. Did she have plenty of time to pack it? Yes! Once she realized her huge mistake, a mistake affecting my life, my happiness, she texted my bestest friend Jentry, who she knew was coming up the mountain, and asked her to bring my dog food that was in my bowl on the floor near the living room. Those were her exact words. Did my ex-bestest friend Jentry get it right? No! She brought me dry dog food in the wrong carry-out container. If you are going to bring me the wrong food, at least put it in the fake butter container with the red lid, not the orange Tupperware with the starburst lid! I can’t get that lid off!! I think it was a conspiracy to starve me.
If that wasn’t bad enough, Mom went upstairs in the church to her staff lunch meeting, and took her good-smelling food with her. She shut me in the office with my ex-bestest friend with nothing to eat! When Jentry stepped out of the office to make unimportant copies of unimportant stuff on the machine right outside the door, I scratched politely on the door to let her know I wanted out. I wanted to go up with my Mom where all the food was. She ignored me, so I started pounding on the door with my paw. I can pound pretty hard, hard enough to shake the door, so hard, in fact, that Jentry thought I was head-butting the door. No, Jentry, I was saving that for you! When she finally opened the door to the office I took advantage of the opportunity to run upstairs to Mom and all the other people eating without me. Mom immediately realized her second mistake of the day and gave me the piddly little bit that was left of her lunch. Before I could finish it, here came Jentry after me. She swooped me up into her arms, apologized for the interruption, and carried me back to the office, all the while scolding me with “bad dogs.” *hurumph* My pitiful looks finally started to work and she said since she was hungry too, and had brought me the wrong food, she would take me to McDonald’s.
Yea! Micky D’s! My bestest friend Jentry bought me Micky D fries and, even though I stared at the bag as hard as I could the whole way back to the church, she made me wait. Once she started feeding me the fries, they were so good I forgot about being mad at her. A short time later while she was in the hallway talking to some people, telling them what a bad dog I had been (I think one of them was my Mom, but I was too busy at the time to be sure) I managed to get the so-called empty bag unfolded and stuck head in it. After some man made a comment about getting a picture of the schnauzer with her head stuck in a bag – but before said deed could be accomplished – my almost-friend Jentry ran back into the office and pried my mouth open before I could swallow the ketchup packet. I guess I will have to try Micky D ketchup packets another day.