Stinky Warrior Princess

It was a cold and cloudy night with a promise of snow to come. We were all tucked into bed — Lucy and Riley in Andrew’s bed and me between Mommy and Daddy in the big bed. Suddenly…

Mommy holding nose: Ewww, do you thmell that? I’m pretty sure it’th Thena’th anal glandth.
Daddy: Ewww, they really stink!
Mommy letting go of her nothe, er, nose: I sure hope they haven’t expressed all over our sheets.

The next morning…

Mommy talking to herself: Ewww, they expressed all over the bottom sheet. *pulls down blankets, removes sheets and throws all in washer with other washables.*
After that load is washed and dried…
Oh no! It’s gone through to the mattress pad. *removes pad and throws in washer with more washables*

Mommy texting Daddy at his work…
“It’s snowing, It’s snowing,
Xe’s anal glands are blowing.
It’s on the sheets, It’s on the pad,
And in the wash they’re going.”

That night I laid under the covers with Mommy’s arm around me. My tail end was facing her nose when…
Mommy: OMG! A fart just blew up my nose! Aghh!
Daddy: Well, at least it wasn’t her anal glands. Eww, I’m getting it now too!

I got my revenge for that embarrassing poem.

You can get away with a lot when you’re a cute Xena Stinky Schnauzer Warrior Princess