Xena the Allergic-holic on Wordless Wednesday

Thanks to Comedy Plus 
for hosting the
Wordless Wednesday Blog Hop.

Lucy: I know you’ve got a lot to say today, but try to keep it short. It’s supposed to be Wordless.

Xena: It’s my turn for Wordless Wednesday and I’ll do what I want, Lucy. Stop bossing me around. When have you ever seen me respond to anyone telling me to be quiet? I’m a schnauzer for goodness sake. What do folks expect? Besides, I have a confession to make…

Hi, I’m Xena and I’m an allergic-holic.

In the past, I’ve taken benadryl until I became Zombie Dog. Mommy thought I’d become a boring old lady at three years old, not realizing she’d been sedating me for several months!
I’ve been tested at an allergist for dogs (you can read about that here and see the picture below).

Mommy gave me my special sea rum allergy shots from the allergist every week for two years. I didn’t mind. I always got a good treat before and after the shot. Here I want to give a shout-out to my breeder, Granny, for paying for it all!

Then, when Mommy questioned why the sea rum shots weren’t working, the allergist fired us (you can read about that here).

I’ve taken Zyrtec, and that doesn’t help much. Lavender EO doesn’t help. Sea Beady oil doesn’t help.

You might wonder why Mommy doesn’t get me “allergy” shots, which are steroids. Her first schnauzer, Freda, had allergies and the vet gave her lots of those shots. Mommy didn’t know steroid shots can cause Cushing’s Disease until Freda got it. The vet knew that could happen but didn’t say anything before giving them. Mommy says she believes in something called “informed consent.” If that’s true, I don’t know why she doesn’t ask for my consent when she informs me that I’m going to get a bath.

Then there’s the new “miracle drug” for allergies. It’s called Apoquel. My ex-allergy dogtor said to never, ever use it. Everyone loves it because it hides the allergies so well that the pup doesn’t seem to be suffering from them anymore. But like in *Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, the allergies come back with a vengeance, many times worse than before the sly Apoquel.

I’ve been on a raw diet to help keep my gut healthy ever since I adopted Mommy and Daddy. A healthy gut means I shouldn’t be an allergic-holic. More changes had to be made. Now I’m only getting organic, grass-fed meat and organic veggies and no chicken or pork, but I’m still getting organic, free-range, grain-free eggs and egg shells. Maybe I shouldn’t be…we don’t know. And now, while it’s still only February, I’ve scratched another sore place under my ear. I guess I’m just addicted to allergies…

Mommy hasn’t given up being my AA (Allergies Anonymous) group leader. We’re trying something new: tumeric paste. It’s yummy and it stains Mommy’s fingers and counter tops and sink yellow. She doesn’t care about that if it helps. I get 1/4 teaspoon spread out several times a day because it doesn’t stay in my system long. She just found out she can also put it on my ouchie under my ear. It’s safe for me, and I like it, so we’re going to give it some time to help. (I hope Lucy doesn’t lick it off my ouchie.)

While “researching” tumeric, we also found out it’s supposed to help with lots of other conditions, too.

  • Can help with weight management
  • Kills parasites such as fleas and ticks
  • Can elevate mood and treat depression
  • Relieves allergies
  • Alleviate joint pain
  • Remedy for diarrhea due to it being a binding agent
  • Prevents cataracts
  • Can help treat epilepsy
  • High in fiber, vitamins, and minerals
  • Clinical trial shows that curcumin helps aid in Alzheimer Disease

So we want to share this information with you. The article also tells us how to make a paste (it’s easy) and how to use it and lots more.

Live long and prosper,*
Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess, the recovering Allergic-holic

* We’ve been watching a lot of Star Trek lately.

Xena’s Woes

It’s been kind of a rough few weeks. First, in wondering if the allergy sea rum injections were really helping me, Mommy contacted the allergist’s office. Let me tell you about them. They had an office here in town that they visited once every two weeks, which was quite enough. Then the vet who owned the office and used it the rest of the time decided the space needed remodeling, so the allergist couldn’t work there any more. Then the pandemic hit and, well, let’s not go into that. So Mom would have to drive a couple of hours north or west to get me to see the allergy dogtor. She said that was ok, but wanted to talk to the dogtor first. A few months ago she got into an e-mail war with someone who was supposed to be the dogtor, but Mommy believes it was an office worker who posed as the dogtor, ’cause no professional would have been so inaccurate, repetitive, and smart-alecky as this person was in their responses. This time she decided to call and keep calling until someone answered or returned her messages, but even a bull dog has their limit of how many times they can call and leave a message with no response. She finally used their website to send a message saying she wanted to talk with my dogtor about how I was doing, as I still itch – especially in the high allergy season – and if she should stop the shots and try something else. Actually, I didn’t mind the shots. I always got two big, high value treats – one before and one after the shot. Mom finally got a reply in the form of a text. They “fired” us! They said they couldn’t help me anymore and there were several dermatologists in our area! Seriously? Can a dogtor actually fire his patient?

I got fired.

Mommy’s pretty sure the dogtor never actually saw her message, and it was the evil staff person again. But what can you do when you can’t get past the rottweiller at the gate? I guess you just turn around and go somewhere else.

In the meantime, I’ve chewed the top of my front leg raw. Now I have to wear a shirt with sleeves that Mommy made me. I still try to get under there to lick the yummy coconut oil she puts on it!

I hate wearing clothes.

If that isn’t enough, I’ve started hopping on my back right leg when we go for walks. Trot trot trot hop, trot trot trot hop. I get a pretty good rhythm going with it. So I haven’t been allowed to go on walkies with Mommy and Lucy lately. When they get ready to go, I get my treat puzzle, like I’m supposed to ignore I’m getting left behind just because there are yummy dried beef heart pieces in the…wait, don’t you want to go for a walk, Lucy? Mommy’s been looking for a doggie chiropractor but the two who helped Angel Freda and Angel Lexi have retired. I hate to admit it, but resting my leg really has helped.

But wait! There’s more! Last time I was at Dr. Karen’s for my DNA HW test, she said I had yeast around my girl parts, so Mommy took care of it with coconut oil and some essential oils. Now Mommy thinks I might be a yeastie beastie, and that might be why I’m still itchy. She has stopped feeding me my probiotic sauerkraut at night and kefir for lunch. Grrr. She said fermented stuff feeds the yeast. She’s also washing me in a natural tea tree and peppermint essential oil shampoo from 4Legger.

Shania: Hi Miss Xena. I’m allowed out when you’re in the tub ’cause I’m “safe” then. I came to visit you while you soak in your anti-yeasty shampoo.

We don’t know where yet, but there are rumors that there is a holistic vet downtown. I may be paying him (or her) a visit.

I am Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess, aka Grruvah. (I answer to my new Hebrew name now!)

I Feel Like a Puppy Again

Xena: Hi, hi, hi! Guess what? Wait, I’ll tell you. Mommy read about how bad bennies are for people…

Lucy: It’s benadryl, Xena. Bennies are something else. We don’t get those.

Xena: Well, we don’t get the dryl stuff anymore, either. That’s what I’m here to tell everyone about. So anyhow, as I was saying, Mommy thought, “Hmm, if they are that bad for people, then they can’t be good for dogs, either.” She said you could read about it here if you want to. But keep on reading my story, too. Mommy thought I had changed because I had turned two years old. I was mostly laying around on the love seat and didn’t want to play. The only things I was still enthusiastic about were food and Freestyle. Friday morning, after reading that article, Mommy only gave me a Xertec for my allergies, and no bennies.

Lucy: Xena, I told you, it’s not bennies. And Xertec is spelled Zyrtec.

Xena: No, like I told you before, it’s XERTEC like my name XENA,

Sorry folks. Sometime Lucy thinks she knows more than me. So later in the day when Mommy called to let Daddy know she was finally on her way home from work, he told her that he didn’t know what caused this big change, but that I had been running all over the house with my stuffies.

Do you want to wake up and play with me, Ell?

I had started playing with Lucy again, too. I ran outside with my bully horn and even came back to get another toy to play with in the yard. Mommy knew why, and had conflicting emotions. She was very sad that she had been suppressing my joy, and very happy that I was still the same puppy she knew, and hadn’t really changed.

Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess is back!

So instead of those bad old bennies – Lucy, don’t even say it – I am getting a bath about every other day *pthhh* with BioHex Shampoo with Chlorhexidine and Miconazole. It has microsilver and ceramide in it. (Mommy helped me with those words.) Now I am hardly itching at all and I’m wide awake and ready to rumble! ( heard that last part on TV when the folks were gone.) Anyone want to play?

I’m my Mommy’s happy puppy again.

XOXOXOX Xena on Xertec (only)

Purim Hustle, Bushes and Allergies

PURIM

Xena: Hey there. I think I told you that Mommy is now the office manager in a synagogue and I’m not allowed to go, right? Well, they recently celebrated something called Purim. It is pronounced like Pour Rum, he, he. It’s where you’re supposed to get drunk and act stupid.

Lucy: Xena!

Xena: I’m telling the truth. Look it up. They even wear funny costumes. Well no one got drunk, but they did have a talent show. Daddy dressed in his polyester leisure suit and him and Mommy danced a Hustle.The people were clapping and cheering. I think maybe they really were drunk, BOL.

Then parts of a book of the bible called Esther were read in Hebrew, and every time the name Hamen was read, the drunk people booed real loud and swung their noisemakers. I don’t think I would have liked being there, ’cause that would have scared me hurt my sensitive ears.

THE BUSHES

Lucy: Mom advertised that she had four big bushes in front of the house that anyone could have if they dug them up themselves.

Xena: Why did she do that? Why would she give away our bushes?

Lucy: A couple reasons, Xena. 1. She’s “sick and tired of having to trim them”. That’s a direct quote, by the way. And 2. She’s too cheap smart cheap to pay someone to get rid of them for her. So she came up with this scheme. She especially dislikes that big green one cause it is so tall and cause it gets prickly and cause stingy insects live in it in the spring. She even told the Hated Bush that it was going to a new home soon where it would be loved and cared for. I guess she didn’t want it coming after her. Anyhoo, a nice couple wanted them all, so they came over and started trying to dig up that yellow and green one next to the Hated Bush.

Then they discovered that it had something called a water root that had made its way into the main tube connected to the gutters, the one that carries water away from the house. They ended up sawing off the water root and dragging the whole thing into the woods. They said the Hated Bush probably had a big root in there too. Of course the Hated Bush would do something like that, right? One down, three to go.

Xena: Were those the people I was barking at?

Lucy: Yes, they are sure to remember the noisy little dog that lived in the house with the Hated Bush.

Xena: Grrr.

Lucy: Riley and Andrew came over the other night. Mom had asked our peeps brother Andrew to do a favor for her. I heard Mom whisper to the Hated Bush, “Now you’re going to die! Then you are getting hauled off to the dead bush burial grounds!” I think it might have shivered…or, it could have just been the wind.

Xena: But the bushes are still there!

Lucy: Uh huh. It seems Mom just can’t get rid of them. Brother Andrew power washed the shed and did some other work first, and then it got dark out and he had to go home. Now I’m hearing something about some brush killer that is in the shed. If she does that, we’ll have to stay away from them cause they might try to take revenge by poisoning us. But I heard Dad say, “No.” That’s really weird. Only Mom says, “No.” He said we’ll wait on Brother Andrew to come back.

ALLERGY UPDATE

Xena: My allergy shots are not totally working yet so my allergy dogtor said to get some new shampoo called Head and Shoulders with Zinc. It’s a very special shampoo to help me not itch. I got some new conditioner, too, that my allergy dogtor makes himself. It smells nice and makes my hair super soft. The only problem is that I have to get a bath every two to three days.

Lucy: What’s the problem with that.

Xena: I don’t like it. I’m also taking a very special pill called Xertec. So far so good.

Lucy: That’s Zyrtec, Xena.

Xena: No, no, it is the same as my name. Xe for me, Xe.

Lucy: Why do I even try?

Lucy and Xe Schnauzer Warrior Princess