Lucy: Hey Xena, have you heard anything from Ludwig since he left in such a hurry with Mr. Eleephant?

Xena: What do you mean? Why would I hear from him? He was just going to visit his pawrents in New York City, right? What could he possibly want to tell me?

Lucy: Oh, I don’t know, maybe about all his shenanigans since he left. I googled him, and it seems he has a wild side we didn’t know about. You’d better sit down. Sit, Xena, sit!

This was the first picture that popped up with his name.

Doesn’t this look like Ludwig going into that club?

Xena: Well, it’s dark out and it’s from the back. Really, it could be anyone. Besides, Mr. Eleephant isn’t with him, and Ludwig’s supposed to be taking care of him.

Lucy: I found this one in the Tattler.

That’s the Australian model Shanina Shaik he’s with there.

Xena: He was probably just passing her by on the sidewalk on his way home to check on Mr. Eleephant.

Lucy: Paparazzi don’t take pictures of someone just passing someone else by, Xe. Here’s another one.

Look how that woman is looking at Ludwig. She seems to be enjoying his company. And he’s smiling pretty big, too.

Xena: But, but, I’m sure they were all just going the same direction. Or maybe they are nurses he’s taking home to help care for Mr. E.

Lucy: Yeah, he probably is taking them home… I’ve got one more. Wanna see it?

Xena: *hangs head* No, but go ahead and show me.

Lucy: Ludwig is helping to DJ at a rave.

A short while later

Xena: Daddy, I need you to help me write a note to Ludwig.

That’s a good one Daddy. OK, now tell him about the big party we had and sorry he wasn’t around, and there were lots and lots of nice boy dogs there who liked me. And that I’m going away the end of the month to a big bash in Nashville. No, he doesn’t need to know it’s Aunty Jen’s birthday, or that I’m staying at her house while you and Mommy and all the peeps go dancing. Oh, and be sure to tell him I’m looking forward to seeing a certain really big boy dog there. And, and, oh just make up some more stuff.

Lucy and the vindictive Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess