Xena’s Story: Halloween in Paris

“I’m so glad my Mommy and your Sissy let us stay in Paris,” woofed Xe.
“Yep, even if Sho did send little Missy the mouse to keep an eye on us. As though we wouldn’t notice her hanging around, spying,” laughed Tye.
“I’m also glad Missy agreed to only send good news back to Sho and Mommy when we offered to include her in everything we did!” exclaimed Xe.

“Hey, Missy,” the pair yelled out together, as they were often wont to do. Let’s head on over to the river bank and see what’s going on. The café let us have the night off from tasting food, er, I mean waiting tables, and licking, er, I mean washing dishes so we could enjoy Halloween! They’re so nice there. They even said please, please take the night off, take several nights off. We can text Gigi on the way to meet us there,” finished Xexe.

A short while later, the foursome met up on the bank of the Seine.
“Look at that friendly pumpkin,” observed Tye. What fun we are going to have tonight! I bet we get lots of treats, too!” she added.
“Gigi, will you take a picture of the three of us?” implored Xe.

“This light is quite flattering,” observed Tye.
“Oh, my,” squeaked Missy, “I forgot to smile. And now Miss Mommy and Miss Sho will know I am in cahoots with you two. I’m sorry, Miss Mommy and Miss Sho!”

Later, after nightfall…

“Let’s go to Disneyland Paris,” suggested Gigi. “They always have a big blast for Halloween. It should be tons of fun. And *giggle* maybe we can sneak in like we did at the museum and all those other places we got thrown out of.”

“Poof” said Mickey the Magician. “You’ll disappear if you enter here.”
“Grrr,” growled the pumpkin. “Turn around or you’ll never be found.”
“Come closer,” enticed the witch. “Turn into wood, rot where you stood.”

“Well, we sure didn’t get very far,” grumped Xe. Who knew they would have this elaborate system set up to make you leave if you didn’t have a ticket!”
“Ooo, that was scary,” squeaked Missy the mouse.”
“Let’s go find somewhere better,” meowed Tye with disdain.

“I know,” said Gigi, trying to make up for the Disneyland failure. “Let’s go to the Eiffel Tower. It is never disappointing, and it is free.

The next morning…

“Wake up, my friends,” woofed Gigi. “It’s time to go home.”

“Where am I?” asked Tye. “I felt this terrible sleepiness overtake me and I laid down and fell soundly asleep.”
“We never made it to the Eiffel Tower,” Gigi answered. “You fell asleep, like you said, and Xe went into a stupor. I could not rouse either of you, so I sat here and watched over you both all night to make sure no one played a Halloween prank on you. It was very odd. It was like the pumpkins acted as the poppies did in the Wizard of Oz.”
“I dreamed I was wearing the Cone of Shame, and JenJen Bear came to comfort me,” said Xe.
“Well, I hate to tell you this,” laughed Tye. “Oh, never mind. You’ll realize it soon enough.”

“But I also had an even scarier dream,” said Xe as she began to shake with fear. “Angel Lexi came back as a Vampire Dog…”

“Bwah, ha, ha, ha. I have come… to suck…your blood.” Lexi’s voice could be heard in the distance, moving away from the four friends. “Man, I love Halloween and the Big Guy letting me come back to have some fun!”

As Gigi, Tye, Xe, with Missy riding on her back ran as fast as they could toward their Paris abodes, their screams reminded all of the terrors of All Saint’s Eve.

Xena’s Story: Paris Part 2

Lucy: So Xena, it seems that your story character Xe has a new friend. What are they going to do? You can’t just leave the story there.

Xena: They’re going to have grand adventures, and another friend is joining them. In the meantime, I made a new page for my blog that has the whole story book up to here, with no silly interuption of Mommy grooming or you doing other stuff. Here’s what happens next.

PARIS REUNION

When last we met, Xe had just met a lovely French poodle named Gigi. They quickly became fast friends. Gigi offered to show Xe more sites in her home town, so Xe extended her stay at the Air B&B for an extra night. The next morning over café au lait, the little schnauzer regaled her hosts with stories of both her day in Paris as well as her adventures with her BCFF (Best Cat Friend Forever), Tye. Xe and Gigi had just returned to the Air B&B to prepare for anther fun day together when Xe got a text.

“It’s Tye!” Xe exclaimed. “She’s’ on her carpet, hovering over Sacré-Cœur. Let’s go!”

Gigi already knew who Tye was from their long talks the evening before. The pair ran as fast as they could to the stairs to the summit and on up to the butte Montmartre, the highest point in the city. They only stopped once to catch their breath before reaching the basilica.

“There she is! Here I am, Tye! Down here!” Xe hopped up and down and waved frantically with excitement.

Making a smooth four-point landing, Tye had barely hopped off her carpet when she felt Xe’s arms around herwith a big schnauzer hug. They grabbed paws and danced in a hoppy circle with excitement. Tye, in her fancy French beret, suddenly stopped as she saw another dog approach.

Gigi, who had been holding back, shyly approached the happy pair.

“This is my new friend, Gigi,” explained Xe when she finally stopped hopping. I just know you two will become good friends too. She has offered to be my – and now our – tour guide in Paris.”

“Meow, meow, meow! A friend of Xe’s is a friend of mine,” smiled Tye.

“Je suis heureux de vous rencontrer,” responded Gigi.

Tye turned to Xe, and whispered, “Uh, did she just swear at me?”

Gigi, who had very good hearing, said, “No, no, mon amie, that was ma langue français. I will speak your language, English, if you like.”

Having come to that agreement, Gigi offered – in English – to take them to the famous horse racetack, the Hippodrome de Longchamp Moulin. She explained that it is a lesser-know attraction where the locals enjoy losing their money. After paying their 2€  each to enter, they found the best seats, right in front of the track.

Xe, very confident in her running abilities, stated, “You see those horses? They could run faster if they didn’t have men on their backs. I bet I could even beat them in a race right now.”
“Ah, but you could not beat me.” The little poodle said this with such confidence that Xe couldn’t help but challenge her to a race.
As soon as the horses began leaving the track the three friends ran out onto the racecourse to settle who was fastest. Tye decided to let the race be between Xexe and Gigi, taking on the role of “starter.”

“Xe! Stop! You’re running the wrong way!” Tye called out as Tye tried to get her turned around.
“Wee!” exclaimed Gigi. “C’est fantastique! Je vole, je cours si vite!” (I’m flying, I run so fast!)

(A little later) “Wow, quelle fun?” Gigi exclaimed. “I have never before been in a race and I have never before been tossed out of a venue. Vous deux savez comment le vivre.” (You two know how to live it up.)

“I thought you said you would speak English so I could understand you,” complained Tye.
“Je suis désolé, er, I mean, I am sorry,” answered Gigi. “My English is actually very good. I just forget, since I was helping Xéxé practice her French. Now, let’s keep exploring.”

“Here is the Musée Picasso. It is a ‘must see.'” This time, instead of paying the admittance fee, the trio slipped in the dock door as the museum was receiving a delivery– something Gigi would never have done by herself.

“How strange all these paintings and statues look,” mused Xe. “That Picasso dude must have had a really warped mind to come up with all of this. Hey, Gigi, we never got to finish our race. Wanna’ try to catch me?” Xe started running with Gigi close behind. Several statues wobbled, almost tipping over. They stopped and listened at the sound of approaching footsteps.

Tye, oblivious to imminent company, was still thinking about what to do with the big-nosed man in front of her. “Hmm, this doesn’t make a very good scratching post. Maybe I’ll leap onto his head and take a bite out of that huge schnozzle.”

“Hey! You three, what are you doing in there?” a guard asked as he approached. Gigi quickly translated the guard’s French.
“Nothing,” they all said in unison, with wide eyes and ready to flee.
“Sortez!” He gave them all a stern look while Gigi told Tye and Xe that they were being thrown out of the museum.
The friends ran for the nearest exit, trying not to do any damage on their way. They got outside and stopped at the bottom of the stairs, woofing and meowing in laughter.
“That is two times – deux fois – we have been thrown out of somewhere! How fun!” laughed Gigi. “Let us find our next adventure.”

As they travelled through Paris, they came to the pool of water in front of the Louvre. Xe quickly got out her ball and jumped in to cool down.

“Wee! Wait for me!” yelled Gigi. “I have always wanted to do this, but never before had the nerve.” The little French and German-American dogs played ball in the water until – once again – they got thrown out. Tye, not too fond of swimming, watched from the side, and clapped her paws and laughed as they they climbed out of the water. “Here, we will cool you off too,” woofed Gigi as she and Xe shook the water from their hair. “It is getting late,” said Gigi, “and I must go home before Maman wonders what has happened to me. She worries too much.”
“Come on, Tye, we can stay at my Air B&B tonight,” said Xe. “You will like our hosts, and I am sure they will let me stay another night. I have a nice room and big bed we can share. Help me remember to text Mommy to let her know I am OK. She worries about me, too, even though I am a big girl now.”

“Oh, that reminds me,” meowed Tye, “I promised to te xt Sho when I found you in Paris, and, with all the excitement, I forgot! I’d better do that too.”

And so, another fun day in Paris ended, with plans to meet up the next day.

Xena’s Story: Magic Carpet Time

Lucy: Your story really had some punch last time. I can’t wait to see what happens next. Why don’t you take a break from practicing your Freestyle and write another one, Xexe?

Xena: Great idea, Lucy. Although I sure do love the cheese I get when I work my Freestyle figures with Mommy! Let’s see, where were we…

Part 3 Chapter 5: Magic Carpet Time

The day after the party, the sun was barely peeking over the tree tops when Sho began to purr in Tye’s ear.

“Rise and shine, little sister. It’s time to go pick up our renovated magic carpet and see how much we can carry on it to take to Canada. Wake up our friend, Xe, too.”

When Tye heard that they were going back to the magic carpet emporium, she shook herself awake, then shook Xe awake. She was secretly hoping that she would get a parting gift of her very own carpet from her friends in Tyeland.

“There’s something I haven’t told you.” Xena was trying to hold back a big smile as they entered the store. “I emailed my Mommy and told her that even though I love you a lot, Tye, we might need some time apart. So, you’ll never guess…she bought me my very own magic carpet. Apparently the emporium takes credit card payments over the phone!”

At this unexpected news, Tyes eyes got huge. She jumped up, grabbed Xe’s paws and they both hopped around together with joy.

“Have you picked it out?” asked Sho.

“Even though I explained that I am a ‘sperienced carpet driver, Mommy said I had to get the new, self-driving model with auto-pilot,” answered Xe. “Here’s the one I chose.”

When Tye saw the carpet Xe had bought, her face went whiter than it usually is, and tears filled her eyes. “But that’s the one I wanted,” she sobbed.

“We know,” purred Sho as she stroked Tye’s head. “That’s why I splurged with the rent money we got and bought you the same one. Now you and your BDFF (Best Dog Friend Forever) have matching flying carpets.”

Tye started sobbing harder with joy, and pulled her sis and her BDFF both in for a group hug.

“How about if we take them for a spin,” suggested Xe as she hopped up on hers. Tye didn’t have to be asked twice.

“Sho, take our picture,” the BFF’s said in unison, before breaking out in giggles.

Off they both flew out the door and across the top of the jungle. They could see King the snake and little Missy the mouse taking a leisurely stroll on the jungle path; lots of beautifully colored birds they didn’t know, as well as Tyeko, their next door neighbor; and various other inhabitants of the jungle. Soon, their growling stomachs urged them to tell the carpets to take them to Hut Canada, where they were hoping for more banana splits. Being mischievious youngsters, they got distracted once they arrived at the hut.

“Hey, Xe, do you want to try jumping onto the roof of Hut Canada with me?” meowed Tye.

Lost in her own thoughts, Xe mused, “I wonder what would happen if I climbed onto Tye’s carpet…”

“Girls!” cried out Sho. “I thought you were mature enough to have your own carpets, but maybe I was wrong.”

Startled, Xe said the first thing that came to mind. “Will you make me a banana split to go? I need to pack my suitcase. It’s a long way to Paris, even with my new carpet,” she explained.

“Paris?” Sho and Tye both exclaimed as the carpets settled softly onto the grass.

“That’s my second surprise,” giggled Xe. “Mommy also said that with my new self-driving carpet, plus me being three whole years old now, that I’m allowed to take a trip. I picked Paris. That’s where Mommy took me our first summer together, and I’ve been wanting to go back and see more of the city.”

While Sho made breakfast banana splits (they had granola sprinkled on top), they all chatted about everything Xe would see see and do in Paris. Sho also said that they planned on leaving for the country Canada the next day, so they still had some preparations to make. Then the sisters hurridly cleaned up the kitchen while Xe packed her suitcase.

“Give your carpet good directions, and listen to its warnings,” advised Sho.
“Have fun and send us postcards from Paris!” added Tye as she waved bye-bye.
“Text me your new address and I will send them there,” Xe answered with a woofy smile.

With barely a whisper, the new carpet rose from the green grass of Sho and Tye’s lawn. With a course set directly across two continents, Xe headed off to her next adventure.

Xena’s Story: Sho and Tye Think Canada Part 3

Where we left off was with a beautiful, 3-point landing of Sho’s magic carpet, right in front of the hut Canada in Tyeland, Shortly afterward, Sho drifted into a deep sleep (probably from exhaustion, although Xe drove all the way there from Tennessee, so Sho shouldn’t have been that tired). If you missed that, you can go read about it here at the Canadian Cats. As Sho lay snoring…

Tye: Are you getting bored, Xe?

Xe: Yes. We need an adventure. *thinking* Hey! Do you remember how we wanted to try stuffing a mouse down a cobra’s throat, but your big sister Sho was always around so we couldn’t do it?

Tye: Yep, and she’s sound asleep in our hut Canada now.

The friends, about to embark on an adventure, take off through the jungle, looking for a mouse and a cobra.

Tye: Hold the snake still!
Xe: I’m trying. Maybe there’s a stick or rock that could help.
Tye: No!! Don’t let it go!
Mouse: Help!! Help!! I don’t want to die!
Xe: That mouse screaming for help isn’t helping. And you went up too high in the palm.
Cobra: *gurgle* You’re choking me!
Tye: I’m hanging down as low as I can without falling.
Xe: There’s a little stick I could wedge in the snake’s mouth.
Cobra: When I get loose *gurgle* I’m gonna kill you, *gag* you stupid schnauzer.
Tye: Forget it, he’ll get you while your back is turned. On the count of 3, we both let go and run as fast as we can. One, two, run!

A short while later…

Sho: *yawn* I had a good nap. Did you two do anything interesting while I was asleep.

Xe: You mean like shove a mouse down a cobra’s throat? Woof, woof!
Tye: Yeah, or almost fall out of a palm? Meow, meow, meow.
Xe: We waited on you to take a nice walk with us.
Sho: You two are so funny. Let’s stroll down the jungle lane to see if there’s anything interesting going on. Some pretty flowers should be blooming this time of year.

Xe, whispering to Tye: Do you think the cobra’s gone? Remember, he threatened to kill me!
Tye, whispering to Xe: Maybe, but let’s wear sunglasses or hats just in case, so he doesn’t recognize us. We’ll have to keep a watchout. And “flowers” will be our code word for cobra.

Tye: Do you see any flowers?
Xe: Nope, nothing.
Sho: Look, I see a flower over here.
Tye and Xe: Eeeeek!

At that, Tye and Xe turned and ran (again) all the way back to the hut Canada.

Sho: Those two are so funny together. I’m glad they’re having a good time.

Sho never suspected that the “pretend” story of a cobra and a palm could be true, and she continues to sleep well because of it.

This concludes part 3, but stay tuned for part 4, coming to a blog near you.

Xena Schnauzer Warrior Jungle Princess

Xena’s Story: Sheltering in Place with Sho & Tye Part 2

Sho: Well, if we had to be stuck somewhere other than Canada during this pandemic, I’m glad it was here with you and Xe. And Tye had the right idea with this spa tub. I – being a cat – didn’t think I would like it. But it’s so relaxing.

Lu: It’s true, Sho. And this inoculation of Corona tastes pretty good. Do you think it would work better if we had it in “shots”?

Both: BOL, MOL, ha, ha, ha, *hic*

Xe: Hey, what are you two doing?

Tye: OMC, I can’t look. I think they’re naked!

Lu: Of course we are, silly cat. None of us wears clothes. Well, except when you put on that strange-looking hula skirt. The real question is, what have you two been up to?

Tye: I flipped Xe the bird. Xe: And then I shot Tye the bird. Both: Yep, we kept flipping each other the bird and it was lots of fun.

*earlier that day*

Tye: I’m so glad we found these old rackets up in your attic. *whack*

Xe: *whack* Me too, Tye. Shoot that angry bird back to me and I’ll flip this one right back atcha.

Xena’s Story: Sheltering in Place with the Siamese Sisters

Tye: I’m getting bored with this Shelter in Place thingie. Hey Xe, let’s play a new game.

Xe: OK, what do you want to play?

*a bit later*

Tye: Sit still, I’m almost done fixing your hair. Then I’ll do your nails.

Xe: Curlers in my beard? And I see nail clippers! I’m outa here.

Tye: Wait, Xe, you’re going to like this next part….trust me.

Xe: Mmmm, can I have the recipe for this juicy drink? When can I eat the cucumber slices?

Tye: Wait til I’m done with my spa soak and I’ll get you finished up, Xe.

*meanwhile*

Lucy: What do you suppose Tye and Xe are doing in the house?

Sho: Hmm, all I know is I’m enjoying laying here in the sun. Do you like the drink I made for you, Lu? I’m sure those two are having fun playing some silly game or another.

Tye: And then you step like this *hic* and wave your front arms *hic* and wiggle your hips. *meow, meow, meow*

Xena's Story Part 5

Lucy: Your stories are selling like hotcakes, Xena. We should be getting royaltreats or something like that. I’m going to check with our publicist. Oh Mo-o-o-o-ommm…

Xena: What’s the “we?” I’m doing all the work.

If you missed any of our story, you can click on Part 1 and Part 2 and Part 3 and Part 4. It’ll help Part 5 make more sense…

Xena’s story: A Dog and her Cat Friends, with another Plot Hound, Part Five

The driver in the old truck barked at them to stop. “Y’all stop now, y’hear? I’m your ride to the big white house. Didn’t Ho No tell y’all to ‘spect me?”

“So you aren’t the ICY Plott Hound from Texas?” the two friends asked.

“Golly no, I’m a NICE Plott Hound from the hills of Georgia. My name’s Sally. That thar one you mentioned is my cousin Leroy. He thanks he’s hot stuff. Come on and jump in the back and I’ll getcha where yer goin”.

“I think we should trust her,” whispered Xe. “What do you want to do, Tye?”

“Let’s get in. We can always jump out if it’s a trick. But my gut feeling is she’s one of the good hounds.” So off they went in the back of the truck, getting ever closer to the big white house.

*87 hours later* (It was an old, slow truck.)

“Here we are, little ladies,” woofed Sally, “the big white house is thar, behind all those bushes. Which reminds me, it’s time for a potty break.”

“Let’s go find the person who can help us stop this unjust incarceration of Siamese cats,” meowed Tye. She jumped out the window of the truck, and Sally helped Xe down from the truck bed. Before she would go any further, Xe ran a comb through her beard and leggings and put on her favorite scarf, so as to make a good impression on the person in charge. Xe asked Sally, “Is this the big white house?”

“Well,” Sally replied as she hurried off to do her bizness in the bushes, ” it is a big white house, now ain’t it?” After bagging up her droppings in a Mickey D’s carry out container left over from lunch the previous day, Sally hopped behind the wheel and drove off in a cloud of white exhaust fumes.

After Xe and Tye stopped coughing, they climbed the many steps up to the front door of the big white house, where they woofed and meowed as loudly as they could until the door opened. Upon telling the door man why they were there, they were ushered into a stately sitting room, where they waited for the Person In Charge, who they decided to refer to as PIC.

Pretty soon the PIC entered the room. Xe had seen pictures of the ICY PIC who lived there, and was not looking forward to this encounter. As expected, this man was tall, made even taller by the stove top hat he was wearing. “That’s different – I’ve never seen him wear a hat on TV,” thought Xe. His hair wasn’t that fake yellow, and his face didn’t look the same, either. Maybe a new person had moved in and taken over, she thought. He lowered himself into the largest chair in the room and removed his black hat. “Welcome to the big white house,” he said congenially. “What can I do for you today?”

“I would like some fresh meat and veggies, please,” Xe politely asked, just before her stomach started growling again.

Tye started to protest, meowing that wasn’t the reason they were there, but the NICE PIC clapped his large hands. The person who answered the door entered the room, and the NICE PIC told him to bring his guests food, saying, “No one can think right on an empty stomach. Give them whatever they want.”

Xe requested salmon, and whatever fresh veggies were available. After thinking for only a moment, Tye asked for shrimp. While they were eating, the NICE PIC told them entertaining stories about his childhood and his beloved dogs and cats. Soon they were able to relax with full bellies and an affinity for the NICE PIC.

Tye settled into her new friend’s lap, partially slipping under his suit coat to keep warm. Xe sat at his feet while they took turns relating the injustice of incarcerating innocent Siamese cats, as well as the horrors of the detention center. The NICE PIC, who said they could just call him Abe, softly stroked Tye while listening attentively. As their story came to an end, he promised to make a Proclamation declaring all animals and people equal, and that he would put an immediate end to the detentions. They sensed he was an honest person, and thanked him profusely.

“Now, let’s get a picture of us all for posterity,” he said. I believe this day will go down in history. Xe was very glad she had spiffed herself up after her long journey, and hoped no food was stuck to her beard as was wont to happen. Abe assured her that she looked lovely, so she relaxed and faced the camera.

The two friends accepted the invitation to stay the night, and, after a night-night treat, slept soundly in a big soft bed.

The next morning they all ate hearty breakfasts which had been prepared specifically to each of their tastes and diets. It was a beautiful, sunny day and Xe and Tye were outside taking care of necessary business in the bushes when a shadow suddenly covered them both. Tye began to jump up and down, meowing loudly. Xe thought the shadow must be from a cloud until she looked up – and would have wet her pants if she had any on and if she hadn’t already taken care of that business – and saw something she thought was only in story books. Abe had offered them a helicopter ride back to Tennessee, but it seemed they wouldn’t need to use it after all.

Be sure to check out what actually happens next by reading Shoko’s story at The Canadian Cats this Friday! Then come back next Monday for the grand finale of my story.

Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess with Lucy as my Editor

Xena's Story Part 4

Lucy: Xena, you’re on a roll, so take it away!

Xena: Take it away where? What are you talking about, Lucy? I’m watching to see where this squirrel goes.

Lucy: I mean, go ahead with more of your story. Your adoring fans are waiting to hear what happens next. *sigh* I’ll watch the squirrel for you.

If you missed any of our story, you can click on Part 1 and Part 2 and Part 3. It’ll help Part 4 make more sense…

Xena’s story: A Dog and her Cat Friends, with another Plot Hound, Part Four

With a newly-found resolve, Xe and Tye headed in the general direction they thought was toward Tennessee. It was early morning, so they kept the sun on their right as they walked. From old habits in Siam, where Tye was from, they kept away from the water as they traveled, so nothing could jump out and eat them. As they walked they talked about many things. The pair recalled the fun they had together in Siam, and how Tye would catch mice to throw at any leopards or tigers they might encounter. That led to Tye relating her voyage from Siam to Texas and the mice she caught and cared for. Then the conversation took a more serious turn.

“You know what happened to you when you got off the ship wasn’t right.” Xe got angry just thinking about it. “We need to do something so it doesn’t happen to any more Siamese cats.”

“It’s true, Xe. I was so excited, thinking about seeing you again and the fun we would have, and the next thing I knew I was sitting in that detention center eating rotten vegetables. I hadn’t done anything wrong! I don’t understand why I got treated like that!”

“We need to go to the big white house and ask the people in charge to make those ICY people stop doing that,” exclaimed Xe. But it’s a long walk; we’re going to need a ride.”

No sooner did Xe woof their need for a ride than a horse came galloping up to them.

“I hear you’re in need of a ride.” The horse bowed her head as she addressed Xe. “How can I help you free everyone of tyranny and oppression and rotten vegetables?”

Xe and Tye looked up at this huge horse, who seemed to genuinely want to help them, even if she was a bit zealous and also a bit off the mark of their goal. “What is your name?” they asked in unison, both with a slight quiver of fear in their voices.

“I am a Horse with No Name,” replied the magnificent creature. “Tell me why you are out here in the middle of nowhere, and where you want to go.”

Xe was spell-bound that there could be a Horse with No Name. Ignoring the horse’s question, Xe asked, “Have you been to the desert? I hear in the desert you can remember your name.”

When the Horse with No Name didn’t reply, Tye and Xe related their experiences over the past few days.

“Stay here,” said the horse as she wheeled about on her hind legs and cantered off into the scrub brush, just out of earshot. They could hear her whinnying and nodding her head, but couldn’t make out what she was saying into her iphone.

“Both of you, climb on my back and I will get you as far as I can,” the Horse with No Name told them as she skidded to a stop in front of them.

The two friends looked at each other, and, with unspoken agreement leaped upon the Horse with No Name’s back.

As their newest friend started off at a full gallop, Xe and Tye laid down and hung on for dear life. “Ho No!” they screamed,” we’re going to die!”

“How did you guess that I go by ‘Ho No?’ asked the Horse with No Name.

“Is that a Hawaiian word?” asked Tye.

“No, it’s short for HOrse with NO Name,” replied the horse. “And I won’t let you die. I’ll stop if I feel one of you slipping off.”

On like that they went for about 87 miles, with Ho No settling into a smooth trot that she could keep up for hours. The riders kept their eyes closed for a long time, pressing themselves against her broad, flat back. Except for an occasional grunt, their claws digging into her sides didn’t seem to bother Ho No at all. At one point, Tye opened her eyes, and seeing how pretty Ho No’s mane was braided, asked her about it. “It’s because I’m a girl,” Ho No said as if that was the only explanation needed.

After what felt like 87 hours Ho No came to a halt. “This is the end of the line for me, girls,” she whinnied. I’ve gotten you as far as northeast Georgia. I spoke with one of my friends, who is going to pick you up and take you the rest of the way to the big white house.”

“Will we see you again?” Tye began to ask, but Ho No had already disappeared down the back dirt road in a cloud of dust. Or maybe it was a cloud of red clay since they were, after all, in Georgia

They waited there for about 87 minutes, watching for another horse to appear, hopefully one with a real name. They were taking advantage of the fresh water nearby (that Ho No had promised was safe), when an old truck came charging down the road.

“Xe Xe,” whispered Tye, ” get your nose out of the grass and look at this. I think maybe the ICY Plott Hound has found us, but something looks different about him.”

At that, Xe whipped around, ready to make a run for it with Tye.

To be continued…

Xena’s Story Part 3

If you missed Part 1, click here, and Part 2, click here.

Lucy: OK Xena, you’ve kept everyone waiting long enough. It’s time for the next installment of your story. Let’s see, you left Tye in an interment camp for illegal Siamese and others our country didn’t want here, and you were on your way to get her out. What happens next? Do you get Tye out and bring her home with you?

Xena: Well, you see, I’ve been thinking about it, and sometimes things get worse before they get better. At least that’s what I’ve heard. But maybe not too much worse…

A Dog, Her Cat Friends and a Plot Hound Part 3

Xe took her suitcase full of good raw meat – frozen to keep it from spoiling – and hopped the first bus she could find heading out to the detention center in Texas where poor Tye had been imprisoned.

Xe told the driver what was happening, and he put the peddle to the metal, ignoring the rest of his stops. Later that night the driver dropped Xe off at the address Tye had given for the center and wished her well.

Meanwhile, Tye was saying goodbye to the second doggie she had ever made friends with. Pedro the chihuahua had been picked up by Border Patrol and been detained until he found a sponsor. A nice American man rescued Pedro the chihuahua. Instead of saying, “Gracias,” Pedro kept yelling, “Quiero Taco Bell.” He must have been starving!

Tye, also famished from subsisting on a diet of rotten vegetables, pleaded with the man to take her, too. “Please, nice man, won’t you take me home with you, or at least get me outta here and onto a bus to my friend’s house in Tennessee?” But the man said he was only allowed to rescue one detainee at a time. He promised to try to come back for her, though, especially since she and Pedro were now friends.

Xe had hidden in the bushes until the breakfast bell rang and the guards all went off to eat. As she stealthily approached the fence, a man carrying a chihuahua walked past her.

The pup kept screaming something about Taco Bell, and that made Xe’s stomach growl loudly. The man walked faster, thinking Xe was about to attack. Xe thought about following them, hoping to score a taco, but resolved to get Tye out from behind that fence first. Yes! Tye was her first priority, even over her stomach, and that shows a lot of love from a schnauzer, even a warrior princess schnauzer.

All the resolve in the world couldn’t help her when an ICY Plott Hound guard suddenly appeared from around the corner. He had heard all the yelling, and came to see if someone was passing out tacos. Xe decided to make a run for it ..

… when the ICY Plott Hound guard grabbed her by the back leg and slung her into a bag with a sign on it that read, “Schnauzer meat, good to eat.” Xe hoped the sign was a joke, but what kind of a person – or dog – would joke about that! In short order, Xe was processed (no, not made into meat; her paperwork got finished), then she was thrown into a detention area.

Even though this was not the reunion they had both imagined, Tye and Xe were happy to see each other again. “What’s in that red cooler over there?” asked Xe. “Rotten vegetables,” replied Tye, with a look of both disdain and resignation on her face. Xe was about to explain that there were good probiotics in some rotten veggies when a sudden flash of hope shone in Tye’s eyes. She looked at Xe and whispered, “We can plan our escape together. There is a COOL guard in here who likes me, and she will help us!”

The next day, when the COOL guard came to see how Tye was doing, she was surprised to see Tye cuddled up sleeping with a schnauzer warrior princess – and Minnie Mouse.

Xe had remembered to pack her bed, a pretty scarf to wear to sleep in, and a mouse toy for Tye. Tye had to meow Xe awake so they could confer with the COOL guard.

“Excuse me ma’am,” woofed Xe (Xe had been raised to have good manners), “could you please help us get out of here? I am Xe Schnauzer Warrior Princess, and I am a citizen of the great US, born in Georgia and living in Tennessee. You can check my AKC papers, it’s all right there.”

After looking over Xe’s official papers, the COOL lady took them to the office to start the process for her release. And since Xe really is a citizen of the US, she also applied to be Tye’s sponsor. While Xe and Tye waited, they filled their bellies with the now thawed meat that Xe had brought.

87 hours later, the paperwork was still not ready. Come nightfall, the two friends snuggled up to sleep in the comfort of each other’s company. The next morning the COOL guard, also called the NICE (short for Not ICY) guard by Tye and Xe, returned with all the paperwork they needed to be released and allowed to go back to Tennessee.

“Well, we’re out,” meowed Tye, who still wore her ID from the detention center. “Now what?”

“I don’t know,” woofed Xe. “I don’t know how to get home from here, and I want my Mommy.”

“Don’t worry,” Tye said in her best soothing voice. “I’ve come all the way from Siam, almost got thrown overboard on the ship, got locked up in a detention center, ate rotten vegetables for a week, and then my bestie XeXe came and rescued me!”

At Tye’s words, Xe had to smile, if only a little, and her heart swelled with love for her cat friend. “You’re right, TyeTye, it can only get better from here. Let’s go home.”

The sun was just rising behind them as they began their journey north on paw, hoping that a NICE person would give them a lift to Tennessee.

Come back next Monday to find out what happens next.

Story and pictures by Xena, all rights reserved, except for certain cats in Canada who are part of this story. But the mean old plott hound can’t use this to his own devices.